Flower Mandala – White and Yellow Peony
My Life Manifesto (For Today)
This I believe. I am alive.
Fully, completely, eyes-wide-open alive.
There were a hundred times when I could have given up,
said “no more” or made a different choice —
not an easier choice, just a different choice.
And still, I am alive.
I celebrate the perfect alignment of the stars,
the constant roll of the waves, the greening of spring once more,
and the miracle of my patchwork life.
There are times when I search for my life’s work,
question what I have done of worth, what good am I doing now.
And then, this realization. Stunning.
Thus far, my work has been to survive.
Survival is my life work.
It is good work, worthy work, honest work, hard work.
This. This I need to remember.
When I ask countless questions that have no answers,
when I wonder why; when I tremble with fear
and anxiety; when I grieve; when I despair or doubt.
There is always this.
I am doing my work. That is enough.
To Walk in Solitude, To Listen to Silence
The more zigzag the way, the deeper the scenery.
The winding path approaches the secluded and peaceful place.
~ Huáng Bīnhóng
Reflecting on what silence looks like. I ponder what a photograph of silence might look like, and then wander (apt word) through a few of my photo catalogs. I’m drawn to the many photos of paths or trails leading into wilderness areas, paths I walked alone in silence. A meditative kind of walking.
Whether I am walking along a sand dune, part worn boardwalk and part shifting sand . . . or through a green forest, thick with green vegetation, towering leafy trees, wildflowers sprinkling pastel colors amidst my feet . . . or tramping on a desert trail, worn deeply into the side of a mountain, stretching through stands of cactus, climbing over piles of tumbled rock . . . or strolling on the smooth pavement in a tended garden, walking further and further away from the crowds, deep into the recesses where few wander, but joy is found . . . or hiking along a snaking path through the wilderness of badlands, a barren maze of eroded land, ridges, peaks, and mesas — all of these I walk in silence.
I listen to the silence, for silence has a sound. I seek answers to questions and perhaps I’ll figure out an answer or two. Or I simply consider the questions and seek no answers, the easier way to discovery is often simply listening.
“People usually consider walking on water or in thin air a miracle.
But I think the real miracle is not to walk either on water or in thin air,
but to walk on earth.
Every day we are engaged in a miracle which we don’t even recognize:
a blue sky, white clouds, green leaves, the black,
curious eyes of a child — our own two eyes.
All is a miracle.”
~ Thich Nhat Hanh
“Walking is the great adventure,
the first meditation,
a practice of heartiness and soul primary to humankind.
Walking is the exact balance between spirit and humility.”
~ Gary Snyder, The Practice of the Wild
“A fact bobbed up from my memory,
that the ancient Egyptians prescribed walking through a garden
as a cure for the mad.
It was a mind-altering drug we took daily.”
~ Paul Fleischman, in Seedfolks
Our way is not soft grass,
it’s a mountain path with lots of rocks.
But it goes upward, forward,
towards the hidden sun.
~ Ruth Westheimer
That’s the best thing about walking, the journey itself.
It doesn’t matter much whether you get where you’re going or not.
You’ll get there anyway.
Every good hike brings you eventually back home. ~ Edward Abbey
I find my way through the wilderness and eventually back home.
Mailbox and a Foggy Morning
“It’s funny; in this era of e-mail and voice mail and all those things that even I did not grow up with, a plain old paper letter takes on amazing intimacy.” ~ Elizabeth Kostova